How to Last Longer in Bed

Posted: April 12, 2024
Category: Couples counselling, Sex Therapy, Stress

How to Last Longer in Bed : Unveiling Techniques:

Lasting longer in bed is a concern for many individuals seeking to enhance their sexual performance and satisfaction. Premature ejaculation, often linked to factors like anxiety, hormonal imbalances, or lifestyle choices, can significantly impact intimate relationships and self-esteem. Fortunately, there are various techniques and strategies available to help delay ejaculation and improve sexual stamina naturally.

This comprehensive guide explores practical methods to boost sexual endurance, including exercises to strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, mindfulness practices for better control, and lifestyle adjustments like dietary changes and stress management. By understanding the underlying causes and implementing the right techniques, individuals can overcome performance anxiety, cultivate a healthy mindset, and ultimately experience more fulfilling sexual encounters.

Understand Ejaculation Timing

Understanding ejaculation timing is crucial for individuals seeking to enhance their sexual stamina and address premature ejaculation concerns. According to research, the average ejaculation time during vaginal sex ranges from 3-7 minutes. However, most people find sex lasting up to 13 minutes to be ideal. Premature ejaculation (PE) is a common sexual dysfunction where a man ejaculates sooner than he or his partner would like, often linked to factors such as low serotonin levels, hormonal imbalances, prostate inflammation, and psychological factors like anxiety, depression, and stress.

To gain better control over ejaculation timing, individuals can employ techniques like the “stop-start” method, also known as “edging.” This technique involves:

  1. Stimulating until the point just before ejaculation
  2. Stopping stimulation and allowing the urge to subside
  3. Resuming stimulation and repeating the process

By practicing this technique, individuals can train their bodies to recognize the point of no return and develop better ejaculatory control.

It’s important to note that ejaculation timing can vary significantly among individuals, and what may be considered “premature” for one person may be satisfactory for another. Open communication with partners and a willingness to explore various techniques can help couples find a mutually enjoyable rhythm and duration during sexual encounters.

Foreplay Techniques to Last Longer in Bed

Engaging in foreplay can significantly enhance sexual experiences and help partners last longer in bed. According to research, only 18.4% of females reported that penetrative sex alone was sufficient for orgasm. By incorporating oral sex, manual stimulation, or using sex toys, couples can extend the duration of sexual activity and increase the chances of reaching orgasm for both partners.

Furthermore, practicing techniques like masturbating before sex, using thicker condoms, or exploring different sex positions can contribute to delaying ejaculation. Strengthening the pelvic floor muscles through Kegel exercises can also improve ejaculatory control and sexual stamina.

Here are some effective foreplay techniques to consider:

  1. Slowing Down: Consciously slowing down movements and changing positions during sex can help reduce overstimulation and delay ejaculation.
  2. Edging: Practice the “edging” technique by getting close to orgasm and then stopping stimulation, allowing the urge to subside before resuming.
  3. Oral and Manual Stimulation: Incorporate oral sex or manual stimulation techniques to extend the overall duration of sexual activity and increase the likelihood of partner satisfaction.
  4. Focused Foreplay: Dedicate ample time to foreplay activities, such as sensual massages, caressing, or exploring erogenous zones, to build arousal gradually and reduce the risk of premature ejaculation.

By focusing on foreplay and incorporating a variety of sexual activities beyond just penetration, couples can enhance overall sexual satisfaction, increase intimacy, and cultivate a more fulfilling and lasting sexual experience.

Edging and Stimulation Control

Edging and stimulation control techniques can be highly effective in delaying ejaculation and enhancing sexual stamina. These methods involve bringing oneself close to the point of orgasm and then stopping stimulation, allowing the urge to subside before resuming. This process is repeated multiple times, helping individuals become more aware of their arousal levels and develop better ejaculatory control.

One popular technique is the “squeeze method,” which involves applying firm pressure to the penis tip or the area between the shaft and glans when nearing the point of no return. This pressure can help delay or even stop ejaculation temporarily. Another variation is the “stop-start method,” also known as “edging,” where stimulation is halted just before orgasm and then resumed after the urge has subsided.

  • The Squeeze Technique: Apply firm pressure to the penis tip or the area between the shaft and glans when nearing ejaculation. This pressure can help delay or stop ejaculation temporarily.
  • The Stop-Start Method (Edging): Stop stimulation just before orgasm, allowing the urge to subside. Resume stimulation and repeat the process, becoming more aware of arousal levels and developing better ejaculatory control.

These techniques can be practiced during masturbation or partner sex, allowing individuals to become more familiar with their arousal patterns and the sensations leading up to ejaculation. Additionally, incorporating pelvic floor exercises, deep breathing, and visualization techniques can further enhance control and delay ejaculation.

It’s important to communicate openly with partners and approach these techniques with patience and a willingness to experiment. With practice, individuals can gain greater mastery over their sexual responses, leading to more satisfying and prolonged intimate experiences.

Desensitizing Products

Desensitizing products, such as numbing creams, sprays, or condoms containing benzocaine or lidocaine, can be effective in reducing penis sensitivity and delaying ejaculation. These products work by temporarily desensitizing the penis, allowing for prolonged sexual activity before reaching the point of no return.

Last Longer in Bed
  • Numbing Creams and Sprays: Products like Promescent Delay Spray, System Jo Prolonger Delay Gel, and Tauro Extra Strong Delay Spray contain benzocaine or other numbing agents that can be applied to the penis before intercourse. These products are designed to absorb quickly and provide a desensitizing effect for 30-45 minutes, helping men last longer in bed.
  • Desensitizing Condoms: Condoms like Durex Extra Safe Latex Condoms and Pasante Delay Latex Condoms are thicker and contain numbing agents like benzocaine or lidocaine. These condoms can reduce sensation and friction, contributing to delayed ejaculation.

It’s important to note that while desensitizing products can be helpful, they should be used with caution and as directed. Overuse or improper application of numbing agents can lead to potential side effects or reduced sensation for both partners. Additionally, some individuals may experience skin irritation or allergic reactions to certain ingredients.

For those seeking alternative solutions, thicker lubricants like pjur Original Silicone-Based Lubricant can also help reduce friction and sensitivity during intercourse. Consulting with a healthcare professional is recommended, as they may suggest prescription medications like lidocaine creams or oral treatments like Viagra, which can help address premature ejaculation concerns.

Suggestion for read: Understanding Sexual Performance Anxiety

Pelvic Floor Exercises

Strengthening the pelvic floor muscles through Kegel exercises can significantly improve ejaculatory control and sexual stamina. These exercises target the ischiocavernosus and bulbocavernosus muscles that surround and support the penis, enhancing the ability to delay orgasm and prolong sexual activity.

  • Kegel Exercise Techniques:
    1. Floor Lying on Your Back Squeezes: Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Tighten the pelvic floor muscles as if trying to stop the flow of urine, hold for 10 seconds, and then relax for 10 seconds.
    2. Floor Lying on Your Side Squeezes: Lie on your side with your knees bent and tighten the pelvic floor muscles, hold for 10 seconds, and then relax for 10 seconds.
    3. Sitting in a Chair Squeezes: Sit upright in a chair and tighten the pelvic floor muscles, hold for 10 seconds, and then relax for 10 seconds.
  • Tips for Effective Kegel Exercises:
    • Don’t hold your breath during the exercises.
    • Squeeze the pelvic muscles up instead of pushing down.
    • Keep your stomach muscles relaxed.
    • Relax the pelvic floor muscles completely between each squeeze.

Most men can expect to see results after about a month of daily Kegel exercises, being able to hold the squeezes for 10 seconds and complete 8-10 sets. It’s recommended to perform three sets of 10-15 exercises per day, squeezing and holding the pelvic floor muscles for 10 seconds, then relaxing for 10 seconds.

In addition to Kegel exercises, incorporating physical fitness routines, including cardiovascular exercises, strength training, and pelvic floor muscle workouts, can further increase stamina and endurance during sexual activity.

Lifestyle and Dietary Factors

Adopting a healthy lifestyle and balanced diet can significantly contribute to improving sexual function and stamina. Here are some key factors to consider:

  • Weight Management: Maintaining a healthy weight is crucial, as excess weight can lead to inflammation, reducing nitric oxide production and impairing blood flow essential for erections. Men with a larger waist circumference are at a higher risk of developing erectile dysfunction (ED).
  • Dietary Choices:
    • Incorporate nutrient-rich foods like oysters (high in zinc), fatty fish (omega-3 fatty acids), nuts and seeds (zinc, L-arginine, omega-3s), and nitrate-rich vegetables like beets, which can improve blood flow and circulation.
    • Consume a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and fish, as this has been linked to a lower risk of ED.
    • Ensure adequate intake of vitamins B12 (for nerve function and sensation) and vitamin D (deficiency linked to increased ED risk).
    • Consider incorporating fenugreek, as it may help increase free testosterone levels and improve sexual function.
  • Exercise and Fitness:
    • Regular exercise, including cardiovascular activities like walking (shown to reduce ED risk by 41%) and strength training, can improve blood circulation and overall sexual function.
    • Improving cardiovascular fitness through exercise can have a protective effect against sexual dysfunction.
  • Lifestyle Habits:
    • Quit smoking, as it decreases nitric oxide production and increases oxidative stress, negatively impacting sexual function.
    • Reduce alcohol consumption, as excessive intake can worsen erectile function.
    • Manage stress levels, as stress can constrict blood vessels and counteract the effects of ED medications.

While dietary changes alone may not treat premature ejaculation, a balanced diet that supports overall sexual function, combined with lifestyle modifications like quitting smoking, reducing alcohol intake, exercising regularly, and managing stress, can significantly improve sexual performance and stamina.

Communication and Mindfulness

Open and honest communication with your partner is crucial for addressing sexual concerns, including premature ejaculation (PE). Discussing your desires, preferences, and any challenges you face can foster trust, understanding, and a stronger bond. By talking openly about PE, you can work together to find solutions tailored to your needs and preferences.

Mindfulness practices can also play a significant role in improving sexual functioning and intimacy. Mindfulness involves being present in the moment, focusing on sensations, breathing, and eye contact with your partner, while letting go of expectations. This heightened awareness can help you better understand your arousal levels and improve ejaculatory control.

  • Benefits of Mindfulness for Sexual Health:
    1. Enhances interoceptive awareness (awareness of internal bodily sensations)
    2. Reduces self-judgment and negative emotions
    3. Addresses clinical symptoms like anxiety and depression
    4. Increases desire, arousal, satisfaction, and orgasm
    5. Improves genital self-image and relationship satisfaction
Last Longer in Bed

Mindfulness-based interventions, such as the Mindfulness for Sex and Intimacy in Relationships (MSIR) program, have shown promising results in addressing sexual dysfunctions. Participants reported feeling less bothered by their sexual problems after completing the 8-week MSIR intervention, highlighting the potential benefits of incorporating mindfulness practices into your sexual health routine.

Sex Positions and Variations

Experimenting with different sexual positions can be an effective strategy to reduce stimulation and enhance ejaculatory control. By varying positions, individuals can find alternatives that limit direct penile stimulation, allowing them to last longer during sexual encounters.

  • Spooning Position: This intimate position involves the partners lying on their sides, with the receiving partner in front. The penetrating partner enters from behind, reducing the depth of penetration and minimizing direct stimulation of the penis. This position can help prolong sexual activity.
  • Standing Positions: Positions that involve standing, such as the standing doggy or the standing partner carry, can divert blood flow and focus away from the genitals. The effort required to support the partner’s weight or maintain balance can help the male partner last longer by shifting attention to other parts of the body.

Additionally, incorporating sex toys like penis rings or condoms can introduce new sensations and reduce sensitivity, further aiding in delaying ejaculation. Here are some options to consider:

  • Penis Rings: These constricting rings, often made of silicone or other flexible materials, can be worn at the base of the penis to restrict blood flow slightly, potentially delaying ejaculation.
  • Textured Condoms: Condoms with textured surfaces or thicker materials can reduce sensation and friction, helping to prolong sexual activity.

It’s important to communicate openly with your partner and approach new positions and techniques with patience and a willingness to experiment. By exploring different options, couples can find the right combination of positions, toys, and techniques that work best for their individual needs and preferences, leading to more satisfying and lasting sexual encounters.

Conclusion

Enhancing sexual stamina and addressing premature ejaculation concerns requires a multifaceted approach. By understanding ejaculation timing, exploring foreplay techniques, practicing edging and stimulation control, utilizing desensitizing products judiciously, engaging in pelvic floor exercises, and adopting a healthy lifestyle, individuals can gain better control over their sexual responses. Open communication with partners and incorporating mindfulness practices can further enrich the overall sexual experience.

Ultimately, achieving lasting sexual encounters involves patience, experimentation, and a willingness to explore various strategies. It is essential to approach this journey with an open mind, prioritize mutual pleasure and satisfaction, and celebrate the intimacy that comes with a deeper understanding of one’s sexual needs and those of their partner.

FAQs

What is the most effective exercise to improve stamina in bed? Core strength plays a crucial role in enhancing stamina during intimate activities. The plank exercise is highly recommended as it not only develops your core but also improves your thrusting ability and helps prevent back injuries. Regularly performing planks strengthens the muscles in your abdomen, back, and pelvis, contributing significantly to your endurance in bed.

At Inquire Talk, we understand the importance of mental health in fostering healthy relationships. Our team of compassionate therapists offers online counseling, therapy, and psychotherapy services to support individuals in their journey towards healthier and happier relationships. Visit our website to learn more about our services and take the first step towards a more fulfilling connection.

Here are few certified therapists who you can get in touch and book a therapy session with:

Jennifer Campbel Kirk

Wenna Chen

Tommaso Palumbo

Inquire Talk


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