10 Classic Traits of Toxic Masculinity

Posted: August 23, 2024
Category: Couples counselling, Marriage, Relationships
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10 Classic Traits of Toxic Masculinity

Toxic masculinity has become a hot-button issue in recent years, sparking debates about gender roles and societal expectations. This concept refers to harmful attitudes and behaviors traditionally associated with men, which can have a negative impact on both individuals and society as a whole. Understanding what toxic masculinity is and why it matters is crucial for fostering healthier relationships and creating a more equitable world.

This article investigates into the complex topic of toxic masculinity, exploring its definition, traits, and everyday examples. It examines the effects of toxic masculinity on society, including its connection to violence and how it differs from healthy masculinity. The discussion also touches on related concepts like fragile masculinity and toxic femininity, providing a comprehensive look at the issue. By shedding light on this important subject, we aim to encourage reflection and promote positive change in how masculinity is perceived and expressed.

Defining Toxic Masculinity

Origins of Toxic Masculinity

The concept of toxic masculinity has its roots in the mythopoetic men’s movement of the 1980s and 1990s. This movement, which emerged partly as a reaction to second-wave feminism, aimed to rescue what it called the “deep masculine” – a protective, “warrior” masculinity – from what it perceived as toxic masculinity. Through male-only workshops, wilderness retreats, and drumming circles, the movement promoted a masculine spirituality. It argued that men’s aggression and frustration resulted from a society that feminized boys by denying them the necessary rites and rituals to realize their true selves as men.

Key Traits and Behaviors

Toxic masculinity refers to a collection of harmful beliefs, tendencies, and behaviors rooted in traditional male roles but taken to an extreme. It generally revolves around three core ideas:

  1. Toughness: Men should be physically strong, emotionally callous, and behaviorally aggressive.
  2. Antifemininity: Men should reject traditionally feminine behaviors such as showing emotion and accepting help.
  3. Power: Men should work toward obtaining power and status (social and financial) and thus gain the respect of others.

Some key traits and behaviors associated with toxic masculinity include:

  • Being stoic and not displaying emotion
  • Promoting promiscuity and championing heterosexuality as the unalterable norm
  • Engaging in violence and dominance
  • Displaying sexual aggression towards women
  • Avoiding household chores and caregiving
  • Taking unnecessary risks
  • Rejecting feminist allyship

Societal Reinforcement

Society often reinforces toxic masculinity through various means. From an early age, boys are taught that to be homosexual is to be less masculine. Men are constantly given the message that they must be self-reliant, independent, and physically tough to be successful in business, society, and finding a partner. Showing vulnerability often leads to ridicule.

This societal pressure has several harmful effects:

  1. It discourages men from seeking medical attention and mental health treatment, as these are often viewed as signs of weakness.
  2. It perpetuates a double standard regarding sexual behavior, praising men for promiscuity while shaming women for the same.
  3. It leads to higher rates of violent crime among men, as aggression is seen as a way to prove masculinity.
  4. It results in harassment and bullying of those who don’t conform to traditional masculine norms, particularly affecting LGBTQ+ individuals.

Research shows that men who strongly adhere to toxic masculinity are less likely to engage in helping behavior, such as intervening in bullying or assault situations. This highlights how toxic masculinity not only harms individuals but also has broader societal implications.

The Harmful Effects of Toxic Masculinity

Impact on Mental Health

Toxic masculinity has a profound effect on men’s mental health. Society often teaches men to suppress their emotions, leading to significant psychological consequences. Men are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and a higher risk of suicide compared to women. As of 2018, the American Psychological Association reported that men are 3.5 times more likely than women to die by suicide.

The pressure to conform to rigid masculine norms can result in increased loneliness and risky behavior. Men often struggle to seek help for mental health issues, viewing it as a sign of weakness. This reluctance to utilize mental health services can exacerbate existing problems and lead to isolation, potentially causing job loss and strained relationships.

Substance abuse is another concerning outcome of toxic masculinity. Men are more prone to excessive alcohol and drug use as a means of coping with emotional distress. In 2018, significantly more men than women died from opioid overdoses, highlighting the severity of this issue.

Physical Health Consequences

Toxic masculinity also has detrimental effects on men’s physical health. The belief that seeking medical attention is a sign of weakness often leads men to ignore pain and push themselves beyond their limits. This behavior can result in more severe physical damage and long-term health issues.

Toxic Masculinity

Men influenced by toxic masculinity are more likely to engage in dangerous sports and risky behaviors. They may also adopt unhealthy lifestyles, including poor dietary habits and substance abuse. The pressure to appear tough and invulnerable can prevent men from seeking necessary medical treatment, even when injured or facing serious health concerns.

Cardiovascular health problems are more prevalent among men who adhere to toxic masculine norms. The suppression of emotions and the constant pressure to appear strong can lead to chronic stress, which is a significant risk factor for heart disease.

Relationship and Social Issues

Toxic masculinity can severely impact personal relationships and social interactions. Men who struggle to express vulnerability may find it challenging to form deep, meaningful connections with others. This emotional disconnect can lead to communication barriers in romantic relationships, making it difficult to resolve conflicts and maintain intimacy.

In extreme cases, toxic masculinity can manifest as controlling and dominating behaviors. Some men may feel entitled to exert power over their partners, leading to domestic abuse and gender-based violence. This behavior not only harms their partners but also perpetuates a cycle of violence and aggression.

Toxic masculinity also contributes to broader societal issues such as homophobia, misogyny, and rape culture. Men who rigidly adhere to traditional masculine norms may feel threatened by those who don’t conform, leading to discrimination and violence against LGBTQ+ individuals and women.

The effects of toxic masculinity extend beyond personal relationships to the workplace and social settings. It can lead to bullying, harassment, and the marginalization of those who don’t fit traditional masculine stereotypes. This behavior creates hostile environments and hinders the development of inclusive, diverse communities.

Suggestion for read: 10 Signs of Controlling Behavior in Marriage

Toxic Masculinity and Sexual Violence

The link between dominance and assault

Toxic masculinity has a profound impact on sexual violence, fostering an environment where dominance and aggression are seen as inherently masculine traits. This mindset often leads to the objectification of women and the devaluation of non-conforming gender expressions. Men socialized in Western society may feel pressured to engage in intrusive behaviors to uphold masculinity and patriarchy.

Studies have shown a positive correlation between self-reported levels of sexual harassment proclivity and masculine gender role stress. This suggests that the fear of failing to meet male gender role expectations, rather than confidence in one’s masculinity, motivates sexual harassment in various settings, including the workplace.

Victim-blaming mentality

The victim-blaming mentality associated with toxic masculinity creates significant barriers for survivors of sexual assault, regardless of gender. Society often teaches that “real men” should be able to fight back, leading to feelings of shame and self-doubt among male survivors. This mentality has an impact on how sexual assault is perceived and reported.

Research indicates that nearly a third of male college students do not fully understand what constitutes sexual assault, and 35% of students don’t report incidents because they are unsure if a crime or harm has been committed. This lack of awareness contributes to the prevalence of sexual assault perpetrated by men.

Barriers for male survivors

Male survivors of sexual assault face unique challenges due to societal expectations of masculinity. Many men struggle to disclose their experiences or seek help, often waiting years or never doing so at all. Common misconceptions that hinder male survivors include:

  1. The belief that men should be strong enough to overpower an assailant
  2. The notion that men don’t get sexually assaulted
  3. The idea that assault must include violence to be valid
  4. The fear of being perceived as weak for talking about the experience
  5. The belief that a “real man” cannot be raped

These barriers are further complicated by the fact that most men who are sexually assaulted report their perpetrator to be another man. For straight men, this can feel particularly degrading and may be perceived as a threat to their manhood. The issue is equally prevalent in the gay community, with nearly half of all gay men in the UK reporting sexual assault.

The stigma surrounding male sexual assault survivors can significantly impede their healing process. Men may experience conflicting emotions due to societal expectations of male sexuality, leading to confusion and self-doubt. This stigma can make it challenging for survivors to define their experiences as sexual assault, especially if they experienced physical arousal during the incident.

To address these issues, it’s crucial to challenge toxic masculinity and create a more supportive environment for all survivors of sexual violence. This involves educating society about consent, dismantling harmful gender stereotypes, and providing accessible resources for male survivors to seek help and support.

Breaking the Cycle: Redefining Masculinity

Promoting emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence (EI) has become a crucial attribute in redefining masculinity. It involves the ability to understand and manage one’s own emotions, as well as interpret and respond to the emotions of others. Contrary to traditional notions of masculinity that discourage emotional expression, embracing EI can lead to more fulfilling relationships and personal growth.

Toxic Masculinity

Men who develop emotional intelligence often experience deeper connections with others. By acknowledging their feelings, they create opportunities for authentic interactions and foster trust in their relationships. This shift challenges the outdated belief that men should be stoic and unemotional, which has been shown to limit individual expression and perpetuate harmful stereotypes.

In professional settings, emotional intelligence has an impact on leadership and workplace dynamics. Men who understand and manage their emotions effectively demonstrate resilience, adaptability, and strong leadership skills. This ability to navigate diverse emotions contributes to a positive work environment and enhances professional success.

Challenging harmful stereotypes

To break the cycle of toxic masculinity, it’s essential to challenge and deconstruct harmful gender stereotypes. Society often teaches boys that they can’t express emotions openly and must be “tough all the time.” This expectation to conform to an emotionless archetype can contribute to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression.

One way to address this issue is through education and awareness. By encouraging conversations about the importance of men managing their emotions, we can help dismantle stereotypes and promote a more nuanced understanding of masculinity. It’s crucial to recognize that nothing about masculinity is inherently toxic; it can be beautiful, generative, and nurturing when not constrained by sexist ideals.

Fostering healthy male relationships

Developing healthy male relationships has an impact on breaking the cycle of toxic masculinity. Men who are emotionally attuned and responsive create nurturing environments for their children, challenging traditional gender roles and setting the stage for a more egalitarian and emotionally intelligent society.

To foster these relationships, men can seek examples of those who embrace their full humanity and find community with others who celebrate and validate all aspects of their personality. This process involves creating safe spaces where men can express themselves without fear of judgment or retaliation.

By promoting open communication, emotional expression, and mutual respect, men can build stronger connections with their peers, partners, and family members. This shift in approach to relationships helps break down the barriers created by toxic masculinity and allows for more authentic and fulfilling interactions.

In conclusion, redefining masculinity involves embracing emotional intelligence, challenging harmful stereotypes, and fostering healthy male relationships. By doing so, men can create a more compassionate and inclusive society that values the full spectrum of human emotions and experiences.

Conclusion

The exploration of toxic masculinity reveals its far-reaching effects on individuals and society. From mental health struggles to relationship issues and sexual violence, the consequences of adhering to harmful masculine norms are significant. By challenging these stereotypes and promoting emotional intelligence, we can pave the way for a healthier, more inclusive understanding of masculinity. This shift has the potential to create positive change in personal relationships, workplaces, and communities.

To wrap up, breaking the cycle of toxic masculinity requires ongoing effort and awareness. By fostering healthy male relationships and encouraging open communication, we can build a society that values emotional expression and mutual respect. At Inquire Talk, we understand the significance of mental health and well-being in relationships, and seeking professional help through online therapy and psychotherapy can provide valuable support to manage stress and promote emotional well-being. Remember, embracing a more nuanced view of masculinity benefits everyone, leading to stronger connections, improved mental health, and a more equitable world.

FAQs

What are the detrimental effects of toxic masculinity?
Toxic masculinity can lead to numerous harmful outcomes including domestic abuse, gender-based violence, gun violence, homophobia, misogyny, perpetuation of rape culture, and sexual assault.

How do Schrock and Schwalbe view masculinity’s impact on gender inequality?
According to Schrock and Schwalbe in 2009, masculinity can be damaging as it often involves demonstrating virility in ways that demean women, thereby perpetuating gender inequalities. This perspective is supported by McCarry in 2010, who notes similar observations.

What behaviors are commonly associated with toxic masculinity?
Toxic masculinity often manifests through controlling behaviors and a sense of entitlement. This includes exerting dominance in romantic, workplace, and social settings, suppressing those who do not conform to masculine norms, and demanding loyalty and respect without merit.

In what ways can the traditional ideal of masculinity be harmful to society?
The traditional masculine ideal, which often suppresses emotional expression and emphasizes dominance and aggression, can lead to increased violence. This includes a higher likelihood of engaging in bullying, assault, and both physical and verbal aggression.

Here are few certified therapists who you can get in touch and book a therapy session with:

Nicola Keenan

Joanne Welsh

Elaine Tarsh


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